In many ways this sounds like a great idea.  Seinfeld wants to have a show in which couples argue in the presence of a comedian, who acts as a ref.  In reality, one of the best tools healthy couples often use, to deescalate conflict, is a sense of humor.  A sense of humor is a great tool for managing stress, as well as a great way to introduce some really creative problem solving ideas.  I agree that at times the wrong sense of humor can be damaging. Biting sarcastic humor can cut to the core. However, playful gentle humor may be one of the most effective resources, a couple can use, to calm tense times.  It can also be a wonderful tool for creating fun and intimacy when things are going well.

Check out this article about Seinfeld’s idea.

I’ve seen this pattern many times.  If I could write a better article about it, I would.  Instead I will simply give this link to this article by Michele Weiner-Davis.

I remember going to the leaning houses in amusements parks.  In these places you had to stand at angles and it looked like you were walking uphill while it felt like going down hill.  They’d roll a billiard ball on a pool table that was obviously leaning one way, but the ball would oddly roll the other direction.  It all took advantage of building the whole place on one angle and then leaning things the other.  This disoriented people to what is true up and down.

I think at times I do this in my own life.  Especially spiritually.  I get so focused on the things going on right now.  Those things can seem pretty miserable in the present, yet in two years time (or maybe two hours time) I would have no recall of the specifics of that issue.  I’d lost my reference to true up and down.

What is that reference? The Death, Burial and Resurrection sure seems to be a good first place to look. It certainly orients me to up and down.

At first you laugh and then you cry.  I hope the couples I work with can someday celebrate their partners imperfections.